


I Can't Say It

by Imagine_The_Fandoms



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: M/M, a little bit of crying, grells pronouns are he/him cuz im confused, ron is my lil bean, slight angst, will is a little ooc but i couldnt help it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-06
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-10-23 03:53:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17675948
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Imagine_The_Fandoms/pseuds/Imagine_The_Fandoms
Summary: Will and Grell have a fight. Words that neither of them mean and exchanged and both are guilty asf. Ronald storms William's office and untold stories are finally shared.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [hht004](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hht004/gifts).



> This idea came to me while I was watching Will's backstory. I feel like him and Grell probably dated for a while but broke up. This fic will explain (at least, why I think) the reason that Will keeps pushing Grell away.

William looked up as the door to his office crashed open and Ronald strode in, looking very angry. “Yes?” he asked. 

 

Ron walked up to the senior shinigami and slapped him across the face. “What the HELL was that?!” he hissed, practically seething. Will stumbled back. 

 

“What was that for?!” 

 

Ron poked him in the chest. “You know perfectly well what that was for! Why are you always like that around Grell. What has he ever done to you?!” 

 

The older man looked away awkwardly. “Nothing, it’s just… nothing” 

 

Ron threw his hands up in exasperation. “That is NOT a valid reason and you KNOW it”

 

 Will glanced at him, adjusting his glasses. “I HAVE a reason” he said carefully, “But I can’t say it” 

 

Ronald looked like he was about to explode. “Tell me”

 

“No“

 

“Why do you hate him then?“

 

“I don’t“

 

"Is it because he's gay?"

 

"Ronald Knox, I am many things but I am NOT a hypocrite"

 

"Wait what?!"

 

"You heard me perfectly. Now for the last time, I DO NOT HATE HIM"

 

“Then what do you call it?! You treat him like he’s got some kind of disease“

 

“I-”

 

“You’re always horrible to him“

 

“I’m not, it’s just-”

 

“Why do you do it then?! huh? tell me, William give me one good reason-“

 

“BECAUSE I LOVED HIM!“ Will roared before he could stop himself. Ronald actually took a step back in shock. 

 

“Y-you  _loved_  him?“ he whispered. William turned away, his back very straight. 

 

“Yes, I loved him once before“ came the quiet reply. “He did too. But we split up“

 

Ron tried to put a hand on the other’s shoulder but Will slapped it away. “Is that why you’re mean to him then? Because you broke up?” he asked softly.

 

Will shook his head. “No. I push him away  _because_  I loved him. We ended it because I wasn’t right for him, but somewhere, deep down, he still wants to try again. I CAN’T break his heart a second time”

 

The younger shinigami looked close to crying. “I’m sorry, I never knew” This time, Will did turn around and much to Ron’s surprise, a single tear was tracking it’s way down his cheek. 

 

“It’s not something I usually tell people“ he said, walking past the other man and towards the door. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have something to do”

 

“Where are you going?“ Ronald managed to call after him. Will stopped, only for a moment. 

 

“I believe I owe someone a rather overdue explanation“


	2. Explanations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So here's the chapter that everyone has been waiting five fucking years for

William tapped lightly on the Grell's door. 

"Go away Ronald" came a shaky voice. Will shook his head.

"It's me. Will you let me in?" The silence was deafening until there was a little click and the door opened. 

"Will?" The senior stood awkwardly in the hallway, looking everywhere but at Grell.

"I owe you an explanation" Grell gave him a pointed yes-you-do look and waved him in. William sighed. "You never really knew why I broke up with you. I wasn't right for you, I didn't deserve you, I don't deserve you still. You were everything I wished I could be" 

The redhead looked at him, "But you continue to push me away. Don't you know how much it tears me apart?"

"I-I know but that is the reason why I do it. I loved you Grell, so much. More than I can say, and I know that deep down, both of us still want to try again" When the other reaper nodded, he plowed on. "But we can't. I can't and I won't-" he broke off, his voice a ragged sob."I won't break your heart again"

Grell moved over to him, taking William's hands in his. "Kiss me. Please" The senior reaper shook his head, his eyes full of pain.

"I-I can't"

"Why?"

"I'll fall in love all over again" The redhead moved closer, his eyebrows contracting.

"Please, just once. One more time before you disappear" William sighed but tilted his head up and Grell closed the gap between them. The passionate redhead moved his lips against Will's. Grell gently but firmly slid his tongue inside the other's mouth, causing the reaper to jump a little in surprise but he allowed it, tangling one hand in Grell's firey hair.

They broke apart when oxygen became a problem and the dark haired reaper rested his forehead against the other's. 

"Now do you see?" he murmured softly. "Do you see why I can't do it?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And there it is. It's very short and I'm sorry but I thought it was rather fluffy so I hope that makes up for it. Another huge thank you to all who have left kudos on here. hht004 thank you so much again for your support.

**Author's Note:**

> do you guys want me to do a chapter where Will goes and explains everything to Grell? Let me know in the comments! Kudos are appreciated!


End file.
